If you are unmarried — divorced, widowed, never married — please allow me to remind you that your identity, your peace, your wholeness, your value, is never going to be realized in a spouse. Your identity, your worth, is found and made complete in Christ Jesus our Lord.

“You are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God — that is, our righteousness, holiness, and redemption.” ~1 Corinthians 1:30

This is so important for us to hear, both married and unmarried: We are only made complete in Jesus. We need to recognize that in our marriages, we need to stay grounded in that. And if you’re not married, you need to understand it, too. You are perfectly whole in Christ. And the Church should never pressure you to change your status. We all need to stop trying to set up our singles with every neighbor’s grandson or second niece that comes along.

Singleness is not a disease and marriage is not the cure. Yes, singleness can be a struggle and single folks can become discouraged and weary. But can’t you say the same thing about married folks? Marriage can certainly be a struggle and there are plenty of married men and women who become discouraged and weary. But we don’t jump in and offer to help them get a divorce! No, we encourage them and support them and help them grow and persevere and serve and continue to be changed into the image of Jesus.

It’s OK to be single. Single Christians belong to God and are made perfectly complete in Christ. Scripture affirms that being single is a gift from God — stay tuned, that’s for tomorrow’s post. In the meantime, if you’re unmarried, believe that if you’re in Christ you’re already perfectly whole. Everybody else, let’s stop feeling sorry for our single brothers and sisters and stop butting in to their business as if they’re not complete without a spouse.