Category: Cowboys (Page 1 of 46)

Marital Sex Prioritizes One-ness

The title of this post shines a bright light on my misguided leanings toward using alliteration in the main points of my sermons. It’s a preacher cliche, I know, but I’ve got it bad. Looking at it in print like this, “prioritizes” feels like a stretch. It probably was.

This is an important post today. This was the second most important part of Sunday’s sermon. We need to pay careful attention to this point about sex in our marriages because our culture, and in many ways our own Christian culture, doesn’t see this. Sex is where a married couple experiences and expresses their God-ordained unity and equality. Our culture — again, even our Christian culture — can put blinders on us so that we see this truth throughout the entire Bible, but we look right past it.

“The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command.” ~1 Corinthians 7:3-6

The husband has ownership of his wife’s body. Her body belongs to him. Well, yeah. Duh. Everybody knows the husband is the head of his wife.

No! The wife also has the exact same ownership of her husband’s body. His body belongs to her. The husband owes his wife sex. And the wife owes her husband sex. You see what Paul is doing here. The marriage partners are not in a hierarchical relationship where one is over the other. There is no flow chart or chain of command in a marriage. Marriage is a relationship of mutual and equal unity and submission with each partner having equal authority over the other.

Paul does this throughout the whole chapter.

In 7:10-11, he says a wife cannot divorce her husband and the husband cannot divorce his wife. In 7:12-16, Paul says a Christian man who is married to an unbeliever must stay married to her and a Christian woman married to an unbeliever must remain married to him. In 7:32-34, he lists the pros and cons of marriage for a man and then he lists the exact same pros and cons for a woman. Paul is bending over backwards to treat husbands and wives totally and unmistakably equal. In a Christian marriage, the wife has authority over her husband. She does. She owns his body and he cannot deny her his marital obligation. In the exact same way, the husband owns the wife’s body and she cannot deny him.

That’s provocative, huh? What does this mean, that the husband and wife are completely equal?

One flesh. Unity. This is the one-ness.

The first explicit mention of sex in the Bible is in Genesis 2. It’s the same line Paul quotes in Ephesians 5 and 1 Corinthians 6.

“The Lord God made a woman from the side of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called woman for she was taken out of man.’ For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” ~Genesis 2:22-24

When we read this, we think it’s only talking about a physical, sexual union between two bodies and two sets of body parts. But it means so much more than that. Marriage is leaving your parents and uniting with another so profoundly that the husband and wife actually become one new single person. Every aspect of the two lives are sewn together. The man and woman merge into a single, legal, social, economic, emotional, physical, spiritual unit. They give up their rights and independence. They give themselves completely to one another. And one of the most important ways that’s experienced and expressed is sexually.

Sex is the God-created way to give your entire self to your spouse. Sex is God’s way for a man and a woman to say to each other, “I belong completely and exclusively and permanently to you.” That’s why sex outside of marriage is illegitimate and opposed to the will of God. It’s not just body parts; it’s not just a casual, physical act.

If Paul were only talking about body parts, he’d say, “The one who unites himself with a prostitute unites himself with a prostitute.” No. He says don’t unite yourself with a prostitute because, remember, “the two will become one flesh.” One person. The man and woman who have sex are united at every level of their lives. Don’t unite with someone sexually unless you’re willing to unite with that person emotionally, personally, socially, economically, legally, and permanently.

Tim Keller said you could paraphrase the 1 Corinthians 6 passage like this: “Don’t you know the purpose of sex is always one flesh? To become united to another person in every area of your life. Is that what you’re seeking with the prostitute? Of course not! So don’t have sex with her!”

The priority is one-ness. The Bible repeatedly talks about the joy of the sexual union that’s meant to drive husbands and wives toward each other. The Old Testament word is “knowing” each other, which is one of the main purposes for marital sex. If all goes well, your honeymoon should be the worst sex of your life. By God’s design, intimacy grows the more you know each other. The more you learn, the closer you get, and the better it gets. Scripture tells married couples to delight in sexual union because it connects you.

That’s why the Bible does not allow married couples to abstain from sex. He calls on both the husbands and wives to fulfill their marital duty or, literally, the original Greek is more like give what is owed. Do not deprive or defraud, don’t cheat your spouse of what is rightfully hers or his. It’s something each partner owes to the other. So it should never be used as a bribe or a reward for good behavior or something you withhold as a threat or punishment. We joke about making somebody sleep on the couch or we say so-and-so is in the doghouse. No! That’s not right! Now, you don’t insist on sex on demand. Each spouse must be sensitive to the emotional and physical state of the other. But one partner can’t consistently try to get out of it.

The only exception Paul allows — he says this is a concession, he doesn’t like it — is if both spouses agree together to abstain from sex for a limited time for the sake of an unusually concentrated period of communion with the Lord. Maybe a retreat, maybe fasting, maybe concentrated prayer — something big and unusual. But then they should come right back together. It’s a concession, he says, not a command. The Bible does not allow marriage without sex, not even if both spouses want it. Because marriage without sex is not marriage. It’s something, but it’s not marriage.

Couples who have settled into a sexless marriage, in which they’re just living together like roommates, have given up on God’s plan for strengthening their union. Your sex life is, in a lot of ways, of course, your business. But your sex life is for the purpose of making your marriage stronger, making your love deeper, and making your commitments richer. That means your children are dependent on your sex life. Trust me, they don’t want to hear about it. But they’re depending on it. Your church is also dependent upon your sex life, although we don’t want to hear about it, either.

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At the halfway point of the season, the Cowboys are 5-3 and do not have a win against a team with a winning record. They lost to the 1-7 Cardinals! How good can they be?!?

The easiest part of their schedule is coming up now with games against the Giants, Carolina, Washington, and Seattle. After that, it’s Philly, Buffalo, Miami, Detroit, and Washington. If Dallas has any chance at all of catching the Eagles in the NFC East, don’t they have to sweep these next four?

Peace,

Allan

Marital Sex Prevents Temptation

A recent Dartmouth study found that having sex at least once a week gives you the same happiness boost as receiving a $50,000 raise at work. So, if you and your spouse feel like you’re not making enough money, I’ve got at least one suggestion.

That’s not a bad reason for doing whatever is necessary to make sure you and your spouse are enjoying regular and frequent sex together. But we find more and better reasons in the Scriptures. We explored a lot of what I’m posting this week in our sermon yesterday at GCR. I’m writing in this space in order to elaborate a bit where time restricted me on Sunday.

Today’s reason for more regular and frequent sex within your marriage is that it helps prevent temptation.

“Since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband… Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” ~1 Corinthians 7:2-5

This is probably the most obvious reason. A husband and wife should be having sex often enough so that neither of them is frustrated or tempted. You’re trying to avoid the conditions that might allow the devil to get a foothold. We’re not just battling the pull of biology here, we’re fighting against Satan’s attacks on our marriages. And ongoing marital sexuality is a key way to fight. One way for a husband and wife to fight the devil is to have more sex.

Don’t think you and your spouse are not vulnerable to that kind of temptation or that neither of you is susceptible to committing adultery. It happens to godly people all the time! A husband and wife need to be honest about those temptations  and fight them together. There should be an openness to confess to your spouse when you are tempted. You notice you’re mentally drifting or you’re noticing somebody else or you’re becoming emotionally connected to somebody else. The other spouse shouldn’t be shocked that his or her partner is being tempted. Every single marriage gets tested! All of them!

If your marriage is a declaration of the Gospel, if your marriage proclaims the love and faithfulness of God to the world, why would you expect the devil to leave it alone? Confessing it to each other and talking openly about it breaks the power of the secret drama where adultery thrives. Don’t be offended at your spouse’s temptation. That’s a sign of pride. It’s also a sign of pride if you say you’ve never been tempted.

All the studies are consistently showing that married couples are engaging in sex together on average only about two to three times per month. Given the countless opportunities in our world today to satisfy our desires illicitly, the Bible’s instructions to guard against temptation still seem appropriate. Paul’s words are, “Since there is so much immorality.” Well, there still is.

That’s a pretty good reason for regular and frequent sex in your marriage. There are more and better reasons to explore today and through the rest of the week.

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Philadelphia Eagles hang on to beat Dallas 28-23 in thriller

The Cowboys had a 1st down at the Eagles six yard line with 27 seconds to play. The next five plays went like this:

False Start (11 yard line)
Sack (22 yard line)
Incomplete Pass
Delay of Game (27 yard line)
Completion Short of the Goal Line as Time Expired

The Cowboys were inside the Eagles 30 yard line four times in the 4th quarter, three separate times inside the 10 yard line, and they came away with a total of six points. Dallas could have kicked a field goal there at the end to win the game, but McCarthy went for it on 4th and goal on the previous possession instead of taking the points, putting the Cowboys down five points at the end instead of two. McCarthy elected a two-point try on an earlier touchdown instead of taking the PAT, which means Dallas could have kicked a field goal at the end to tie. Yes, it was a close loss to the division-leading Iggles. But only because McCarthy is the Cowboys head coach.

Dallas is 0-4 in their last four trips to San Francisco and Philly. And about as far away from being a contender as California is from Pennsylvania.

Peace,

Allan

 

Broken Through

Today is the one year anniversary of the launch of our Breakthrough campaign at the GCR Church, officially the halfway point of our two-year plan to jump start our congregation’s vision of “Being Changed by God to Love Like Jesus.” On October 30 last year, we asked our church to give $4-million dollars to fund our commitment to transformation and mission.

Since that day, we have begun local missions partnerships with five organizations in Midland that are doing life-changing Gospel work. As a result, we are paying the salary of the first-ever full-time counselor at Family Promise. We are funding the salary of a 2nd staff person at Young Lives. We have purchased a box truck for food deliveries for Mission Agape and a new vehicle for Opportunity Tribe to transport students. In addition, we have completely renovated two courtyard spaces at Emerson Elementary, we eat lunch and read with students there several times a week, and we fist bump those kids the first Monday morning of every month. In total, we have poured well over one thousand volunteer hours into these five partners.

It was appropriate that last night we moved our annual Harvest Party to Family Promise, an organization in Midland that provides housing and resources to families transitioning out of homelessness. The weather forced us inside where we were a little more crowded than we had hoped. But we painted faces and played games and ate hotdogs and passed out tons of candy to 15 deserving families and had a blast doing it.

 

 

 

 

 

This is part of the vision. Intentional, incarnational, relational ministry. Instead of spending nine seconds with two thousand people in our church parking lot, what would happen if we spent two hours with about 70 people where they live? We’re finding out. It’s very different. It’s a little messy. It’s slightly unpredictable. But the stories are gloriously funny and the experience is wonderfully life-giving. I spent 45-minutes at a table last night talking with a foster parent while holding her four-week-old baby boy, learning about Five Nights at Freddy’s from two little guys who were way too into all of it, and joking about how I stepped in it when I asked a boy who taught him how to ride a bike and it turned out to be his dad’s ex-girlfriend. In front of his current wife. I wasn’t the only one having these conversations. I  wasn’t the only one learning about and leaning into the realities of our community with these friendly and gracious neighbors. It was transformational. And missional. And beautiful. Praise our Lord.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These local missions partnerships are a critical part of our vision. But Breakthrough is also about foreign missions and spiritual disciplines and re-organizing our Bible classes and small groups.

In the past year, we have sent 34 of our members on mission trips, hosted 72 of our members at Christian Practices retreats, and placed 165 of our members into twelve new small groups organized around the formation zones of our church vision. We have remodeled our worship center, improved the seating and lighting and sound, and constructed a brand new baptistry and stage that accommodate most of the church family participating in baptisms up close on Sundays.

On top of all that, the Lord has blessed us with a total of 80 new members of the GCR Church since October 30 last year: 53 adults and 27 kids! And in the four Sundays since we’ve been back in our worship center, we have witnessed and participated in six baptisms together!

And we’re not done yet. On October 30 last year, by God’s amazing grace, our church contributed almost $6.2-million dollars in cash and pledges! That’s $2.2-million over our goal! Nearly $4.4-million of that has already come in, and we’re only at the halfway mark! So we have established a team of 15 women and men to discern what the Lord wants to do with all that extra money.

We praise God for what he is doing in us and through us at GCR. It’s an exciting time around here right now. By God’s grace this church is changing. There’s been a fairly significant turnover and it’s not done yet. New faces, new families, new energy, new hope for what our Lord is doing. We are still very much in transition as a congregation. And we are beside ourselves with anticipation over what he’s going to do next.

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My policy is that if you can’t say something bad about the Cowboys, don’t say anything at all.

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The incredible fact is that the Rangers and Diamondbacks are tied at one game each in the World Series. The hard truth is that Texas has led in every inning in this series but three. That’s right. Of the 20 innings played thus far, if you count Garcia’s 11th inning game-winning homer in Game One, Texas has led in only three innings. They have not led since the second inning of Game One. Not only that, over the past ten weeks, the Rangers haven’t just lost one game and then won the next. When they lose, they lose three or four in a row. Texas hasn’t sandwiched a single loss between wins since late August. It feels like the Rangers have to score seven or eight runs to win tonight. And they can’t do it all on Seager and Adolis home runs.

What’s going to spark this team to get it turned around? Semien and Lowe need to heat up their bats and Mad Max needs to go six innings tonight. But there also needs to be a rally point. Some big play. Some massive unforgettable catch or double steal or hustle play or three-run homer to light a fire under this group and radically shift the momentum.

Semien might be too tired. Evan Carter is too young. Seager and Garcia are too expected. It’s going to be Leody or Garver or Josh Jung. I’m thinking out loud at this point, but I’m going with Jung to do something really important in Game Three to get this thing headed in the Rangers’ direction. I’m calling out the rookie. He’s got to shine tonight.

Let’s Go Rangers!
Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

Allan

Jerry, Are You Watching the Rangers?

MLB: ALCS-Texas Rangers at Houston Astros | Fieldlevel | news-daily.com

A note to the owner of the Dallas Cowboys:

I wonder if you’re watching your next-door-neighbors today as they hang the red, white, and blue bunting on their stadium and raise the league championship banners all over the parking lots in preparation for tomorrow’s World Series Game One. Are you watching, Jerry?

Were you watching when Rangers owner Ray Davis lifted the American League Championship trophy over his head in Houston Monday night?

See, Jerry, this is how owners of successful major professional sports organizations do things. Since Ray Davis took over majority ownership of the Rangers in 2010, they have won four West division titles, three American League pennants, and made the playoffs six times. In the past 13 seasons, the Rangers have been to more World Series than the Red Sox, the Royals, and the St. Louis Cardinals. Texas has appeared in more World Series during this span than the Braves and Reds and Cubs combined. Since Davis took over in 2010, the Rangers have made it to more World Series than the O’s, the Phils, and the hated Yankees combined. In fact, the recently dethroned Astros are the only team in baseball with more World Series appearances than the Rangers over the past 13 years. And they cheated to get at least one of those pennants.

Your Cowboys — they are clearly yours — haven’t so much as won a single divisional playoff game in more than twice that long. It’s 27 years now and counting, Jerry.

Are you watching the Rangers? Do you see how Davis does things next door?

He hires a General Manager to run the team. The owner employs a full-time GM to make decisions about managers and coaches, about player personnel and scouting, about strategy and clubhouse culture. And the GM understands that if the team doesn’t produce championships, he will be fired. Ray Davis takes care of stadium sponsorships and television contracts and everything else on the business side. But on the baseball side, he leaves things to his GM. Pretty simple really. Everybody does it this way.

The Rangers made back-to-back World Series appearances in 2010 and 2011 and then failed to win a single playoff series for the next ten seasons. So Davis spent half a billion dollars to acquire Corey Seager and Marcus Semien. When that didn’t get Texas back into the playoffs, Davis fired GM Jon Daniels and manager Chris Woodward. He committed to Chris Young as GM and wrote the massive checks for everything Young and new manager Bruce Bochy wanted to do, and now they’re back in the World Series again.

You might say, yeah, but nobody knows who Ray Davis is. To which I would say, so what? I would bet almost nobody outside of Dallas / Fort Worth knows who Ray Davis is and more than half of all Rangers fans wouldn’t know him if he walked in the room and sat in their lap. That’s kinda the point. Davis doesn’t care about personal fame or glory or even recognition. He knows that if the team wins championships, there’s enough credit to go around for everybody. And a ton more money.

As long as your Cowboys have a General Manager who knows he won’t be fired no matter how many years the team goes without winning a divisional playoff game, nothing’s going to change. As long as the owner/gm continues to pursue stadium sponsorships, concert deals, tractor pulls, and team endorsement agreements at the same time he’s scouting, drafting, making player trades, and semi-coaching, it won’t work.

Ray Davis fired his GM after ten years of the Rangers failing to advance in the postseason and most of us thought it was too long. You are on year 28, Jerry. Your GM knows his job is never on the line, win or lose, succeed or fail, conference championship game appearance or not.

You may be watching what’s happening next door — I don’t know how you could miss it. The issue is that you just don’t care.

Go Rangers. And Rams.

Allan

60 Years and Counting

What a fabulous 60th Anniversary and Homecoming weekend at our GCR Church! People came from all over Midland and even traveled from out of state, coming from as far away as Arkansas, Colorado, and North Carolina to renew relationships and catch up with old friends. More than 500 showed up at the picnic on Saturday for burgers and dogs, cornhole and volleyball, and a once in a lifetime total solar eclipse. We held a youth ministry reunion Saturday afternoon, and then a Praise and Pie event that evening in our newly remodeled worship center. And then 873 of us came together Sunday for a time of reflection and thanksgiving, worship, and a catered lunch. At every event I felt like I had never seen a third of the people. There was energy and excitement, gratitude and praise, and lots of laughter.

 

 

 

 

It was really good for me, personally, to just hang around and listen to the old stories, the formative events from GCR’s past, the really great times and the tough times, to get a better handle on all the connections, and to hear the hope and joy for the present and the future. I’ve only been here a little over two years. I needed to hear about O.C. Collins and those faithful Christians from the North A Church of Christ who planted GCR in 1963. I needed to hear Ronnie White preach — yes, he still knows how. I needed to worship with Andy Spell, I needed to eat coconut cream pie with people who “used to go to GCR,” I needed to look at those old directories and Stream videos. I needed to hear the motivations behind the apartments ministry and the passion for divorce recovery and care and single parent family camp. I needed to be in the same room with these people when they laughed at a 35-year-old memory and when they cried during It Is Well With My Soul and How Great Thou Art.

 

 

 

 

 

It’s good for me and for our present day church at GCR to realize that everything we’re doing now, by God’s grace, is done with the same spirit, the same passion, the same drive, the same love for our Lord and his people that has always characterized the Christians at Golf Course Road. This is a grace-oriented, redemption-minded church. Always has been. Still is.

 

 

 

 

 

What we’re doing now and where we’re going — these aren’t new things. Our vision is not an innovative thing. Our local missions partnerships and ecumenical efforts are not a new direction or some kind of revolution. It’s an evolution born of the Spirit and what has gone before. It’s our church’s refusal to stand pat, our refusal to allow the status to remain quo, our conviction that our God is at work in and through GCR to his eternal glory and praise.

 

 

 

 

 

 

We’ve got great shepherds at GCR. Holy and godly men who share a unified desire for transformation and mission.

We’ve got a great ministry team here. A tremendous group of talented and dedicated disciples of Jesus who share a unified vision for ministry and service.

We’ve got a great church at GCR. An historically great church. A loving and giving church that wants to be challenged, wants to grow, and shares a desire to impact our city for Christ.

Much more than all that, we have our God. We belong to a mighty God, a faithful God, who has promised to finish in us and through us what he started 60 years ago on Golf Course Road.

The one who calls us is faithful and he will do it.

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Nasty Nate did it again yesterday, becoming the first pitcher in these 2023 playoffs with three wins. The Rangers plated four runs on five hits and an error in the first inning, and tight defense and clutch pitching made it stand to take a two-games-to-none lead in the ALCS. Eovaldi worked masterfully out of a bases-loaded, nobody out jam in the fifth inning, and finished with nine strikeouts and one walk in six outstanding innings to earn the win. That’s 24 K’s against one walk for Big  Game Nate in this postseason. And that’s seven straight playoff wins for Texas, six of those games on the road. Now the Astros and Rangers head north up I-45 to Arlington, where Mad Max takes the hill tomorrow night in Game Three.

No team has ever won the first two games of a league championship series on the road and gone on to lose that series. The Rangers need to win two games out of the remaining five to get to their first World Series since 2011. And the next three are in Arlington.

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Dallas Cowboys v Los Angeles Chargers

Mike McCarthy really said out loud last night after the Cowboys squeaker over the Chargers that he intentionally allowed the clock to run down so they could kick that field goal from the 14-yard-line at the end of the first half. The referees and the time keeper had stopped the clock at eight-seconds, assuming McCarthy would take one of his two remaining timeouts and throw the ball into the end zone. If it’s caught, it’s a touchdown. If it’s not, they kick the gimmee three-pointer and go to the locker room. The referees even asked McCarthy, “You don’t want the timeout? Are you sure?” They’re begging him to do the right thing! And he declined, telling reporters after the game he’s all about getting the points. The Cowboys had committed a holding penalty earlier on that drive and he just wanted to make sure nothing was going to mess up that automatic field goal.

He’s all about getting the points? That does not explain McCarthy’s going for it on 4th down inside the red zone two other times last night. It confuses the whole conversation. It must be madness for Dak having McCarthy in his helmet for three hours.

Peace,

Allan

RIP Walt Garrison

Walt Garrison, the Cowboys’ cowboy, has died at 79. The gritty, hard-nosed, tough running back who bridged the gap between Don Perkins and Tony Dorsett and played well in both of the Cowboys’ first Super Bowls; the “aw, shucks” friendly and funny rodeo star who slipped out of the Cowboys’ hotel after team meetings the night before home games to wrestle steers in Mansfield; the Skoal brother who made “just a pinch between your cheek and gum” part of our cultural vernacular in the 1970s; the Denton native who played football as a Cowboy at Oklahoma State and in Dallas, and lived as one off the field — passed away last night. Garrison is one of those “characters” who captured the hearts of football fans and the curiosity of everyone else, and helped make those Cowboys “America’s Team.”

The two times I was lucky enough to encounter Walt personally — once on the sidelines at a Cowboys game in 2003 and once in a Texas Stadium suite six years later — he was everything you want your childhood heroes to be. Down to earth. Friendly. Genuinely pleased to meet you. Really dry and witty sense of humor.

The same guy who answered the reporter’s question, “Did you ever see Tom Landry smile?” with “No. But I was only there nine years.”

Peace,

Allan

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