Category: Allan’s Journey (Page 19 of 29)

Jumping In At Central

Have I mentioned that I don’t know anybody in Amarillo? We don’t have any family up there. We don’t know anything about the panhandle. Or the high plains. Or West Texas. Dallas – Fort Worth is my home. This is what I know. This is where our family is. Our roots are here in the Metroplex. North Texas. DFW. I know the landmarks of DFW. I know the history. The people. The culture. I know how Belt Line meanders through every part of Dallas County and each place where Boulevard 26 changes names. I’ve been watching Gloria Campos and Dale Hansen since I was a small child. Randy Galloway has been on my radio since I was a teenager. I can name all the churches here and tell you at which ones I attended a Summer Youth Series in the ’80s. I know 7-11 and Reunion Tower and Dallas competitiveness and Fort Worth pride. I know R. L. Thornton and LBJ and what it means to be driving south on the North Freeway. I’m familiar with Frisco and Forney and Aledo and Granbury. And I don’t get lost on Harry Hines.

But I don’t know a crying thing about Amarillo.

We’ve made a few trips up there over the past two months since agreeing to move our preaching ministry to the Central Church of Christ. We’ve fallen in love with Blue Sky and have already eaten there a half dozen times. And bought the T-shirts. I know those things at the intersection of 1-40 and Soncy Road are prarie dogs, not ground hogs. I don’t giggle anymore when I pull into the Toot N Totem for a Diet Dr Pepper. I’m growing a real interest in the storied history of Amarillo High School where our kids are going to be Sandies. And, yes, we’ve got those T-shirts too. We’ve taken in the TEXAS musical at the Palo Duro Canyon and are beginning to get comfortable with basements. We’ve already put our mark on Cadillac Ranch, spray painting the empty tomb symbol at the top of one of the middle cars.

It’s not home for us, of course. Not yet. It’s going to take a while. But something happened yesterday that got us a whole lot closer in a super short amount of time.

Loaves and Fishes. Central’s outreach to the poor and homeless in the downtown Amarillo community. Every Thursday. Inside the Central building, Kevin leads more than 150 of these souls in praise and worship to our God. Mary and Hannah make announcements and describe how much food and clothing are going to be distributed. Mark reads from God’s Word and encourages and exhorts, preaches and teaches the Gospel to people who are hungering and thirsting for righteousness. And for bread and water. And they pray.

Carrie-Anne and Carley and I jumped into the middle of our first Loaves and Fishes yesterday. We sang I Surrender All with a whole bunch of people who don’t have nearly as much to surrender as I do. We clapped and grinned through Lord, I Lift Your Name on High and several other songs. And then Mark brought Christy to the front of the room.

Christy has been coming to Loaves and Fishes for quite a while now. She’s never made it to a worship assembly in the main worship center on a Sunday morning, but I’ll bet half of Central knows her. Christy never misses a Thursday. She’s always there. But, yesterday was different.

Christy was grieving. Her heart was broken. Just 24 hours earlier, on Wednesday morning, Christy had found her 19-year-old son, Caleb, dead of an overdose in his bed in their house. He was her only son. And he was dead. Caleb’s body was in Lubbock awaiting an autopsey. And Christy was in God’s house with God’s people seeking comfort and peace.

We rushed to hug Christy. We put our hands on her and prayed with her and for her. We cried with her. And not a one of us knew what to say. “God bless you.” That’s all we kept saying, “God bless you.”

A few minutes later, once the food distribution began, I grabbed Mark’s Bible and made my way to Christy. Hannah was already there. Listening to Christy. Holding her. Showing her the mercy and grace of our Lord. I opened up the Scriptures to Mark six where the Gospel tells us that while the apostles were rowing against the wind in the middle of a stormy sea, while the wind was blowing them off course, while they were “straining at the oars,” our Christ was watching them from the mountain. He was watching and praying. I showed her the passages in Isaiah 46 where our God promises to carry his children, to sustain them, to rescue them. And then I prayed with Christy.

I met a lot of people at Loaves and Fishes yesterday. I watched God work through my brothers and sisters at Central to minister to “the least of these.” I watched our Lord’s Spirit move through his Church to console and encourage, to provide and protect, to heal.

I saw our God in action. In Amarillo. At Central. He is rescuing the captives and retrieving the plunder. He is saving people. He is impacting and eternally changing lives. He is restoring and redeeming, re-creating. In Amarillo. At Central.

Amarillo is in Texas. It has a Rosa’s. The stores carry Diet Dr Pepper. There’s a Cheddar’s that serves my favorite Buffalo Chicken Strips. They play high school football on Friday night and go to church on Sunday. The people drive pickup trucks and SUVs and say “y’all.” They’re over-the-top warm and friendly. Fiercely loyal. That’s comforting. That’s comfortable. That feels like home.

But the thing that speaks to me, the thing that gives me confidence in this move, the thing that makes me feel right about this, is knowing that God is already at work in Amarillo and has been for a long, long time. It’s God. It’s him. Our God is moving at Central. All I’m doing is just jumping in.

Peace,

Allan

Gratitude For The Day

Things are busy. Good gravy, things are busy. We’re flying in and out of Amarillo every week. Looking for and not finding our house up here. Worried about not selling our house in NRH. Registering the kids in their new schools. Packing. Planning. Phone calls. Meetings. Losing things. Oh, my word, our grass is going to die! Cell phones are not allowed at Amarillo High School?!?! Hooray!!! Which mission trip are the girls on this week? What time was I supposed to pick up Carley? Why won’t anybody buy our house?

It’s super easy to lose track of the day. To miss the blessings. In the midst of my busy-ness, it’s easy to be oblivious to the constant and eternal grace of our Father.

G. K. Chesterton’s little poem of gratitude is keeping me grounded at the end of every one of these busy days:

Here dies another day
During which I have had eyes, ears, hands
And the great world round me;
And with tomorrow begins another.
Why am I allowed two?

Be thankful for the day. And keep reminding me, too.

Peace,

Allan

The Gifts of Preaching

I’m cleaning out my study at Legacy today. Boxing up books. Packing the commentaries and knick knacks. Pulling the pictures down from the walls and throwing away a bunch of stuff, too. It’s taking me longer —  a whole lot longer — than it should to pack up and clean out a 17′ x 11′ room. That’s because I keep coming across the gifts.

The framed autographed photo of Steve Martin taken from a scene in “The Jerk.” Todd D gave it to me a couple of weeks after I had referenced the scene in a sermon on the distractions of material possessions. Plus an original promotional booklet for the movie “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World,” also presented to me a couple of weeks after I compared Ethel Merman’s character to Peninnah in 1 Samuel. Todd D is also the same guy who snail mails me an envelope full of random cartoons every couple of months. I’ve found several of them today. My favorite is the old lady behind the counter at a sidewalk kiosk proclaiming to passers-by, “…and I’m wearing a thong!” The caption says, “The Too-Much-Information Booth.”

A tiny little three-eyed alien from Toy Story sits on top of my tape dispenser, a gift from our Children’s Minister, Jennifer. She had used the little guys in a staff devo one morning to remind us that just as the toys are chosen by The Claw, we are chosen. We are chosen by God. We belong to him. We are his.

A roll of Life Savers with a note attached: Preacher Timer – Upon reaching pulpit, place one unit in mouth; when Life Saver disappears, so should the preacher! Howard C gave that to me a couple of years ago.

A bar of goat milk cheese given to me by Salvador Cariaga, our missionary to the Philippines. The Christians there are becoming economically self-sufficient by the grace of God as he works in and through all those goats. I joked from the pulpit one Sunday while Salvador was in town that I was glad our elders didn’t pay me with a goat. The next morning, I was greeted in my office by a live goat, courtesy of Jack’s Sunday morning Bible class!

There’s a big white posterboard on the door to my study that declares me “the best preacher ever.” It was made and colored and scotch taped there by Camryn and Brighton, two of the sweetest little girls at Legacy. It fell a couple of weeks ago. I taped it back up.

Here’s an electrical outlet spray painted gold hanging from a string of electrical wire and couplers. Keith R gave this to me after installing five ceiling fans in my house and discovering up close how un-handy I am with and around electricity.

The wooden carving of the old pioneer preacher was given to me by Steve P. Dana J gave me the beautiful crown of thorns that I used during our four week sermon series leading up to this past Easter. Joe A gave me a framed copy of our first family picture for the Legacy pictorial directory. Dawson B gave me the little miniature Homer from his Simpsons happy meal. Wayne S took and framed a picture of Whitney and Carley and me standing in a long line in the Academy parking lot at midnight to buy T-shirts celebrating the Rangers’ American League Championship victory over the hated Yankees. Paul Dennis just gave me this copy of Yancey’s Soul Survivor: How My Faith Survived the Church, figuring it might be good reading right about now. And the picture of Quincy and me at his naturalization ceremony sits to my left among photos of my kids.

Gifts. My office is filled with gifts. Every wall, every shelf, every corner contains a gift from somebody here at Legacy. And it takes me longer to pack this stuff because each gift is connected to a person. A story. A relationship.

Those are the real gifts.

It’s not the wood carving; it’s praying with Steve and Pat in their home while he endured multiple foot surgeries and amputations and prosthetics and rehab related to his diabetes, crying with Steve as he recounted the kindness shown to him by his brothers and sisters at Legacy who remodeled most of his home to accomodate his wheelchair.

It’s not the poster; it’s Camryn’s deep friendship with my youngest daughter and Brighton’s really loud comment to a crowd the Saturday night before my last sermon here: “Preach for two hours, Allan, and if anybody has a problem with it, they can come see me!” It’s my love for both of their families who have encouraged me and supported me and loved me unconditionally for every moment of my ministry here.

It’s not the bar of soap; it’s getting to know Salvador’s son and encouraging him in his studies and his Christian ministry; it’s being there for the funeral of Salvador’s father-in-law; it’s praying with him for the poor people in the Philippines and then being inspired by his life of selfless service.

It’s not the little green alien; it’s remembering that Jennifer always tells me — usually right before or after prayer together, sometimes through tears — church work and ministry is not supposed to be easy. If it were easy, it wouldn’t take faith.

It’s not the book; it’s being there at his house within an hour of Paul finding out his son had been killed in a car accident; it’s the huge bear hugs and his tears and his sensitive heart. And his great pain. His unspeakable pain.

It’s not the Homer toy; it’s knowing that I’ll be there to tell him how proud I am of him when Dawson puts on our Lord in baptism this next Sunday.

It’s not the pictures and candies and crowns and cartoons and books. It’s the lives. Those are the gifts that are handed to preachers every day. The gifts of people’s lives. They open them up to us. They give themselves to us. They pour themselves out in front of us. Every day they share themselves with us. They say things to us they would never say to anyone else. They confess sin to us. They dare to dream really big dreams with us. They make promises. They express concerns. They cry. They pray. In front of us. For us. They are vulnerable with us. They give and give and give to us. Nobody else gets gifts like these. And we get them every day!

What a blessing. What a burden. What a beautiful and amazing thing it is to receive these kinds of wonderful gifts.

That’s why it’s taking so long to pack up my study.

Peace,

Allan

Last Sunday

Dearest Legacy Family,

I do not possess the eloquence necessary to convey today my deep love for each of you. As I write this, I’m typing through tears because of my strong affection for you and this church and also because I’m certain that what is in my heart will not be communicated well enough to you today.

Five years ago you placed a faith in me that I didn’t even have in myself. You welcomed my family and me with calls and emails, letters and cards, hugs and casseroles. You honored me by giving me your platform from which to speak to you a faithful word from our God. In time, you grew to love me. And you showed it so well.

I thank our God for my brothers and sisters at Legacy — for you! — who have supported my family and me while we have ministered in this place. You have loved us and encouraged us. You have treated my children as your own. You have challenged me and prayed with me. You have taught me and matured me. You have shown tremendous patience and understanding with me. You have forgiven me. We have grown together. A lot. And you have given and given and given to me more than I could ever possibly ask or imagine.

And we love you, too. Oh, my word. We love you all so much.

Thank you.

Your many expressions of kindness and generosity over the past two weeks have just blown us away. You’ve overwhelmed us again with calls and emails, letters and cards, hugs and casseroles. Thank you for loving us more than we could ever deserve.

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”           ~Numbers 6:24-26

We will always consider you our dear family. Please always consider us your servants in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, to the eternal praise and glory of our Father in heaven.

Peace,

Allan

“A Fork in the Road”

Lord, I don’t want to be a mile-marker on the road of life, that as people pass me by, maybe they notice, maybe they don’t. It doesn’t matter. They continue on in the same direction as before.

But I want to be a fork in the road.

So that when people meet me they must decide which way to go. Because when they meet me, they don’t just meet me. They meet the Christ who lives in me.

~Jim Eliot, from The Shadow of the Almighty, 1956

Arkansas Oasis

“Guess what it is!”

Nelda walked right up to me in the hallway leading out of the worship center into the main foyer of the Benton Church of Christ. We had reached the point of visiting after church at which deacons flip the light switches to hurry us to our cars. Nelda is one of these really nice older ladies at church who’s been there forever. And she was carrying a plastic Wal-Mart bag.

“I have no idea what it is, Nelda,” I answered. “How could I possibly know?”

“Feel it!”

I felt it. It was cold. And lumpy. I had no clue.

So she showed it to me. A skinned squirrel. Head and all. Skinned and ready for cooking. Nelda had been keeping it cool in the church refrigerator and was now taking it home for lunch. She told me all about frying it up, what parts of the squirrel were best, how long she’s been eating squirrel, and how silly I am for thinking it is really, really gross.

I said it out loud before I mentally evaluated the whole situation to see if it would be okay to say: “We must be in Arkansas!”

For nearly a month I had been almost dreading my four day speaking engagement in Arkansas. I love that church there. I dearly love Jim & Mandy and Jimmy & Elizabeth and their precious kids. I’m always encouraged when I go there. And I never laugh more than when I’m hanging out with Jim and Jimmy. But the timing was bad. I’m in the middle of changing churches. We’re in the middle of trying to both sell a house here in North Richland Hills and look for a house in Amarillo. We’re flying up there twice in the next three weeks. I’ve got a last sermon to write. You can’t believe all the phone calls and emails and letters and texts. Meeting brand new people. Processing “good-byes” with our best friends. I don’t have time to spend four days in Arkansas.

I arrived Saturday night to find Trae’s back bedroom ready for me. Yellow walls and zebra-striped sheets and books about horses. A 24-pack of Diet Dr Pepper in the fridge. Hugs and prayers. Words of encouragement and comfort from a great friend who’s been exactly where I am.

Then Nelda’s squirrel Sunday morning. Jimmy in a giant panda suit that I think he enjoyed a little too much. Eric providing a running commentary of singing and humming and synonyms and thoughts throughout each of my eleven sermons from his seat on the left side of the third row. Clyde and Linda were there. Breakfast at Wilma’s house with biscuits and chocolate gravy. (Chocolate gravy?!? Again, we must be in Arkansas.) Lunch at the Benton Kiwanis club with Freddy from church, Will the new fire chief, Julia the warm and crazy club president, and Bill the county coroner. (His stories about the man who literally ate himself to death at the local Sonic last week and the lady who died in front of the TV in her recliner last month but was just thought to be asleep by her husband and daughter for nearly two days reminded me of a Seinfeld episode in which Kramer tells the boys, “If you meet a proctologist at a party, stay right by his side; you’ll hear the funniest stories.”)

Watching Jim minister to people, comfort and encourage people, love on people in the church where he was born and raised. Praying with the Northside shepherds over the needs of their congregation and the world. Being encouraged and comforted and loved by so many wonderful people I barely know.

The Arkansas Oasis was exactly what I needed. Quiet time — lots of quiet alone time with just God and me — among all the hairclips and Legos in Trae’s room. Prayer time. Reflection time. Thinking time. I’m telling you, it did me so much good to have that quiet time away from the immediate pressures of Legacy and Central, to be away from all the things that absolutely have to be done right this second. Yeah, there were still phone calls and emails. But I was removed. I was far enough away to reflect with my Lord and his Word on where God has taken me and where he’s leading me now. I had time to wrestle with and pray through some of the things that confront me in Wade Hodges’ book, Before You Go. Working through my Running the Race series with Northside also gave me ample opportunity to think about my own race, the course in front of me, the endurance and perseverance it will take to complete the race, and the unsurpassed power of my God that will get me across the finish line.

I want to write more about Wade’s book. I want to write much more about these amazing gifts from God at Legacy, these wonderful people at this church where I’ve been so blessed to minister for the past four years. I also want to honor Central in this space and express the excitement and enthusiasm that’s building up inside me for what our God’s going to do with me and through me in Amarillo. I want to write about my church secretaries past and present and future. I want to share with you my thoughts about leaving and arriving. I want to express in this blog my love for Quincy and Paul and Sherry, Dana and Jennifer and Jerry, and others here at Legacy who have been so vital to me and my work here.  I want to write down every single one of the very strong and very mixed feelings I have swirling around in my brain right now without it reading like a whole bunch of disjointed ramblings.

But that may have to wait. I’m still working on that last sermon that I’m delivering here Sunday. We have another open house this weekend at Stanglin Manor. We’re flying to Amarillo Monday morning to look at houses. We’ve scheduled a last trip to Tyler to see Jason & Tiersa and I’ve got a final lunch with my preaching brothers here in Tarrant County and a last meal with the Four Horsemen. All of that in the next seven days.

God knew I needed that time in Arkansas.

I’m ready now for the tasks ahead. I’m prepared to do all the very difficult things that are in front of me. All of them. To the eternal praise and glory of God.

Peace,

Allan

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