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Feeding The Kids

“…bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”
  ~Ephesians 6:4

AllTheKidsThe verb Paul uses that is translated “bring them up” doesn’t do justice to the notion of nurture and care the apostle intended. “Bring them up” doesn’t communicate the loving and intimate relationship that’s a critical part of raising our kids. He uses the exact same verb earlier regarding the relationship between husbands and wives in Ephesians 5:29. And there it’s translated “feed.” “No one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the Church.”

The command is to nurture our children.

The idea is to feed them in the ways of the Lord.

Holy Scripture explicitly places a high value on our children; a value that should not be taken lightly. And the clear commands from the Law of Moses to the Letters of the Apostles to teach our children cannot be relegated to back-burner status. And the job can’t be left for someone else to do. Our children are not to be merely tolerated, but cared for and instructed about life in Christ Jesus.

If stewardship is the proper management of assets, Christian stewardship should focus first of all on nurturing our children. We don’t have any asset more valuable than our kids.

“Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him.” ~Psalm 127:3

Game5ToniteGo Stars!

Allan

Sixteen Rules

In studying this week for Sunday’s sermon on the value of our children and the divine ordinance to teach our children and bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, I’ve come across a list of Sixteen Rules written by Susannah Wesley over 200 years ago. Susannah Wesley was the mother of 19 children, including the great John and Charles Wesley. She made it a point to openly dedicate each of her children to God, to whom they do actually belong. And she parented all her children by these Sixteen Rules. As I review her rules, I’m struck at once by the antiquated nature of the guidelines and, at the same time, the deep, eternal truths in them. Each of the rules has a big-picture world view behind it, a lasting set of life time values within it, and a future vision of godly living ahead of it. Reflecting on these rules individually and as a whole has shown me where Carrie-Anne and I are doing pretty well with our three girls and some other areas we should probably work on.

I also can’t help but notice that over half these rules could be—should be—applied broadly and forcefully to children and adults in our churches.

1)  Eating between meals not allowed.

2)  As children they are to be in bed by eight p.m.

3)  They are required to take medicine without complaining.

4)  Subdue self-will in a child, and thus work together with God to save the child’s soul.

5)  Teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak.

6)  Require all to be still during Family Worship.

7)  Give them nothing that they cry for, and only that which they ask for politely.

8)  To prevent lying, punish no fault which is first confessed and repented of.

9)  Never allow a sinful act to go unpunished.

10) Never punish a child twice for a single offense.

11) Commend and reward good behavior.

12) Any attempt to please, even if poorly performed, should be commended.

13) Preserve property rights, even in smallest matters.

14) Strictly observe all promises.

15) Require no daughter to work before she can read well.

16) Teach children to fear the rod.

Upon further reflection, Jerry Wayne could probably stand to enforce these among most of his players in the Cowboys locker room, too.

Peace,

Allan

Sweet Hour of Prayer

“Pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” ~Ephesians 6:18

Were your ears burning between 9:00 and 10:00 Friday night April 18?

SweetHourOfPrayerA couple of weekends ago all of the elders and ministers here at Legacy spent about 24 hours together at a retreat center down in Glenrose. Most of Saturday was spent in sharing our dreams and our goals for the body of believers at Legacy. What do we want to do for the rest of this year and next? What is God ultimately doing with us? Where do we see things in five or even ten years from now? We spent some time talking about vision and thought processes. The day was filled with much open discussion relating to relationships between elders and ministers and within the leadership team.

I’ve been thrilled since Day One to be Legacy’s preacher. I’ve said before, I don’t feel led or guided by God to this place as much as I feel pushed by God to this place. I’m affirmed every week by our Father that he is doing amazing things with us and through us in our part of his Kingdom. But I’ve never been more confident and more thrilled to be a part of this congregation than I was during this retreat.

And it had more to do with what happened Friday night than with what happened Saturday.

As great as Saturday was—I plan to share much more of that with you later this week—Friday’s experience was even better. Because we prayed. We prayed long. We prayed hard. We prayed together. We prayed for each other. And we prayed for every single man, woman, and child in the Legacy church family.

We split up into groups of two and three, ministers and elders, and prayed together for about an hour. A pictorial directory had been desecrated; sacrificed for our prayer time. We were each given a couple of sheets out of the directory with all the names and all the pictures of all our brothers and sisters in Christ. And then we went off to each others’ rooms to pray.

I wound up in my room with Bob Robertson and Don Savage and the names and pictures of almost 170 Legacy members. And after we each prayed for each other, we turned our attention to our church family.

And I love praying this way.

Looking at the faces and lifting the names to God in prayer, I was reminded of 1) how much I’m blessed to know so many of these great people and 2) how so many of our people are struggling with their own issues and problems.

Carrie-Anne and I spent a lot of time between August ’06 and June ’07  praying that God would bless our daughters with great friends here at Legacy. And four or five times in that room Friday night, those families popped up on my list. These answers to prayer, these moms and dads and sweet, precious girls that God has put in our paths; what a blessing! Other men and women who have especially encouraged me since we’ve been here popped up on my sheet; men and women who go out of their way to compliment me and push me and challenge me and keep me focused and on track. What a blessing! And I praise God for these wonderful people and for the opportunities we share together in the Kingdom. And over and over again, men and women and families who are struggling with serious health issues, financial concerns, and ruptured relationships popped up on my list. I’m encouraged by their perseverence in those struggles and their faith in the face of hardships. And what a blessing to intercede for them to our Father in prayer!

There’s something very, very special about praying like this. Praying like this creates permanent bonds between the people you’re praying with and the people you’re praying for. I see Don and Bob differently now after hearing them pour out their hearts and their souls to God in prayer. You learn more about people by praying with them for one hour than you can ever learn in a lifetime of singing together or going to ball games together. Spend one hour with a couple of people in deep, earnest prayer, and I think it’s impossible not to love them more.

There was a ten-month window between the day Legacy hired me and the day I actually began my full-time work here as the preacher. I was still finishing up school down in Austin and only got up here once a month. So the first thing I did was ask the church here to provide a pictorial directory and ask everyone in the church family to write their prayer requests next to their families names and pictures. They mailed the directory to us and Carrie-Anne and I spent those next ten months praying over those names and pictures. We spent ten months with our God, talking to him about those in this church who had lost loved ones, those who were battling cancer, those who were facing important job decisions. Some people are surprised at how well we know everyone’s names here. And I always tell them, I prayed for you for ten months. I was bonding with you for ten months and you didn’t even know it.

In 1895, E. M. Bounds wrote, “Prayer does not prepare us for greater works, it is the greater work.”

Sometime this summer we’re going to organize a 24 Hours of Prayer here at Legacy like we’ve done in Mesquite and Marble Falls. Men of our congregation will sign up in one-hour shifts and pray in groups of four and five over thousands of prayer requests from our church family and our community. It might be the most powerful thing you’ll ever do with a Christian brother.

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Whitney and I had the talk yesterday afternoon. She understands about Josh Howard. She gets it. We’re going to go together one day next week and get her a Dirk jersey. Lucky for me all Mavericks gear is now half price.

StarsLogoGo Stars!

Allan

Josh Howard's Killing Me

“I am not a role model.” ~Charles Barkley

So, I’m driving home Friday afternoon from our monthly Four Horsemen lunch in Dallas. I had intended to spend the time listening to a couple of lectureship sermons on CD. But the CDs were blank; probably a glitch in the reproduction process. So I was stuck listening to Michael Irvin’s daily show on ESPN Radio.

JoshHowardDallas Mavericks forward Josh Howard was a guest on the show, there to talk about his team’s 0-2 deficit to New Orleans and to promote his summer kids basketball camp. And to their credit Irvin and his co-host, Kevin Kiley, went straight to a Dallas Morning News article by Brad Townsend that reported Howard’s admission of recreational use of marijuana. In that article, Howard is quoted as saying, “What can I say? If you can do it and it’s not affecting your everyday life, why stop?”

And I’m stunned as I listen to Howard talk about his marijuana use. You can read a transcript of the radio interview here. About his regular off-season marijuana use, Howard says, “That’s my personal choice, that’s my personal opinion.” He calls himself a mature adult and claims that Mavs owner Mark Cuban and coach Avery Johnson haven’t talked to him about it because they recognize him as an adult and able to handle his own business without hurting the team. “That’s me,” he says. “That’s what I’m going to do when I’m by myself and my personal time.”

According to Josh, the only thing he needs to worry about is getting suspended by the NBA for failing a drug test. So as long as he only smokes during the offseason, when the league doesn’t test its players, it’s OK. He repeatedly answers Irvin’s and Kiley’s questions with variations on this theme of “I’m not going to put myself in no kind of position to fail.”

The real question though, the one that matters, isn’t about how it affects his basketball skills or whether or not he’ll be caught by an NBA drug test. The real question centers on Josh Howard’s willfully and unashamedly breaking state and federal laws. That’s the one I kept waiting to be asked.

And they finally did.

Kiley finally asked Howard toward the end of the interview, “Does it not bother you that this is against the law?”

And Howard didn’t understand the question. His “What???” response revealed that he was unclear of the concept of law outside his NBA world and professional athlete and superstar entertainer environment. Kiley explained the illegalities of “the purchase and use of marijuana in the United States of America.” And Howard responded, again, with, “I’m not going to put myself in the kind of position to fail.”

He has no idea he’s held to any kind of standards or laws outside his own realm of basketball and the Mavericks. And if he is, he doesn’t care.

One more thing from the interview: Howard’s comments regarding his summer camp. Irvin asked him about the parents of these 7-18-year-old boys and girls who are being asked to send their children to Howard’s camp. Isn’t he concerned about what they think about his open use of marijuana?

“You know, if parents trust me enough to know that I’m out here telling the truth and not sitting up here lying, like everybody else is, I think they’ll give me the opportunity to help their kids out, you know what I mean?…I want these kids to see there’s an athlete out there that really cares about them, no matter what his situation is. He really cares about the community and the kids.”

And then Irvin asks the natural follow-up, “What do you tell a kid when he comes up to you and asks you is it OK to smoke marijuana?”

“I’m going to let him know, you know, personally it’s not for you to do it. But I can’t hold your hand, all I can do is tell you right and wrong. At the end of the day, the kid’s going to make a decision off what he wants to do. That’s what I had to do. That’s what my brother had to do and all my friends had to do. Like they say, you can lead the horse to the lake, but you’re not going to make them drink. I can tell them everything they need to know.”

Now, I’ve written all that to say this: we got Whitney a Josh Howard jersey for Christmas. She loves it and she wears it all the time.

What am I supposed to do?

If you’re angry at Josh Howard’s comments or you’re upset or disappointed or if you think it would be crazy for any parent in his right mind to allow his own child to attend this summer camp so Howard could “tell you right and wrong,” be careful. If you drive faster than the posted speed limits, as Nathan said to David, “Thou art the man.” If you fudge a tad on your tax return or if you lie about your child’s age to circumvent the MySpace rules to set up your kid’s account, “Thou art the man.” You are Josh Howard. But I’d rather talk about that tomorrow.

Today, I need to know what to do about Whitney’s jersey.

My inclination is to buy her a Dirk jersey and make the trade with her, telling her that Josh is breaking the law and he thinks it’s OK to break the law and he thinks he doesn’t need to obey the law and so it’s not a good idea to wear his jersey as a symbol of your respect for him. Of course, some will say that Dirk’s no role-model either with his drunken off-season escapades in Europe and Greenville Avenue. But, while what Dirk does is wrong and not what I want Whitney to admire or emulate, he’s not breaking the law. And if he is, he’s not flaunting it or openly saying that he’s above it.

I’ve tried to be careful about the jerseys and posters Whitney hangs up and wears. I’ve tried to steer her toward the “good guys” in sports. I thought Josh Howard was safe. Maybe 90% of the professional athletes out there do think they’re above the law. Maybe 90% of them live their lives that way. Maybe we should burn Whitney’s Tony Romo jersey and tear down her Mike Modano poster and trash her Michael Young bobblehead. I don’t think so. Her role models are her mom and me and her grandparents and her church family and her teachers at school. We tell her all the time that we enjoy watching sports for the skills of the athletes and the drama of the games and nothing more. She knows that most of them are not worth imitating.

But I can’t let her wear the Howard jersey anymore, can I?

What would you do? How are you handling this story and this situation with your own kids who are Mavs fans?

Unless somebody can come up with a better plan, I’m trading jerseys with her. But I don’t think I’ll have time to do it before the Mavs are eliminated and she turns her full attention to the Stars. And that gives me a little bit of a cushion.

Peace,

Allan

Now Where Was I?

I know. I know. It’s been a while. A full week now as I look back. Thank you for your emails and your phone calls. All four of you. Since Virgil Fry was scheduled to preach yesterday and present the vision for Lifeline Chaplaincy’s Tarrant County mission to our Legacy family, I seized the opportunity to take one of my vacation weeks. And, no, I wasn’t on the beach somewhere in South Texas or in the mountains of Colorado as some of you have suggested. I spent the week painting the exterior of our house. Six days of hanging off a ladder, 24 feet up, with a paintbrush in my hand. I couldn’t be happier to be back in the study today.

Today’s been filled with a ton of catching up. So allow me to just post a bunch of pictures, give you a couple of quick-hit updates, and resume the full-time blogging tomorrow. As always, click on the pic for the full size. Except the one of all the tongues near the bottom. Gross.

Since last we blogged, I’ve performed my first ever wedding ceremony, joining Jim & Elvera (Long) McKillip in holy matrimony. And it was so low-stress for me. They have 120 years of marriage experience between them. And they WeddingBellscouldn’t have cared less about the ceremony itself. It was absolutely a piece of cake for me. They told me to write the whole thing and just show up and do it. No rehearsel dinner. No pre-marital counseling. I asked them if they wanted to at least write the vows and Jim said, “Why don’t you write them and email them to me.” Great wedding. We ate barbecue and peach cobbler at the reception. Whitney, Valerie, and Carley: I hope you’re taking notes.

We were also duped and deceived into attending a PTA meeting. You know how these schools do it. They say your fifth grader is performing in a concert or a play at 7:00 Thursday night when, in actuality, the PTA meeting starts at 7:00 and your fifth grader performs at 8:00. But you don’t realize it until the gavel bangs at 7:01. After they elected next year’s Green Valley Elementary PTA Officers (I almost nominated Whitney for Third Vice-President of Recruiting) Valerie and her class wowed us with their rendition of “We Go Together” from Grease. I hate it when movies I watched as a kid are presented as “classics.” Carrie-Anne’s mom made the poodle skirt. Way to go, Gram!

Val’sLines  ValInGrease

PlayoffLogoNow, about those Stars! I keep having flashbacks to ’99. The Stars keep winning and they keep advancing and we’re so surprised. How do they keep winning? Nobody was really expecting this. They’re playing so well right now. Modano looks like he’s 27 instead of 37. And they’re dominating the 3rd periods. If you’re playing the Stars and you’re not up by two or three goals heading to the third period, you’re going to get beat. Last night’s whipping of San Jose puts the Stars up two games to none in the second round, the second time now Dallas has taken the first two games of a series on the road. That’s only happened four other times in NHL BradRichardsTiesGameInThirdhistory. And all four times, the team that’s started 2-0 twice on the road has made it all the way to the Stanley Cup Finals.

DejectedDirkAnd then there are the Mavericks. Yuk. The Jason Kidd trade, made out of desperation almost two months ago, is killing them. He can’t score like Devin Harris. He can’t defend like Harris. And he can’t block shots like Diop. Man, they’re missing Harris and Diop. More than that, though, they’re missing Josh Howard. So far in the four games against New Orleans, Howard is averaging only 12.8 points per game on just 25% shooting and 6.5 rebounds. Yuk. And while Mavericks fans probably have huge issues right now with everything from the Kidd trade and Avery’s coaching to the ManiAACs shirts and Laura Green’s hair, my biggest issue—an insurmountable issue for me—is with Josh Howard. And I’m facing a serious dilemma right now in my own house over it. I’ll have to share all this tomorrow and maybe even solicit your opinions and advice.

NewRoofThey’re finally putting the steel roof on our new worship center here at Legacy. The north side was finished Saturday and they’re working on the south side today. By this time tomorrow, I think, everything will be dried in and they can start really working on the inside. The air-conditioners and duct work are in, the rock at the front of the worship center above and around the stage is set and a lot of the interior walls are taped and bedded. I’m still hopeful this can all be done and we can be in the new building by our next 5th Sunday on June 29.

Matt&ElizabethI also want to share with you this picture of Matt and his daughter, Elizabeth, in our living room last night during our Small Groups Church meeting. She’s reading from Romans 15 and I can’t resist the picture. Passing on the faith in our homes. Our children singing with us and reading with us and watching their parents and other adults worship and study and pray. I love the picture and the way it symbolizes one of the key things Legacy Small Groups Church is about. Apply the Word, Connect as a Family, and Evangelize the Community. And do it together.

After last night’s Small Groups meetings I/we hosted a come-and-go ice cream deal to celebrate Carrie-Anne’s 40th birthday. It was a surprise right up until the moment I walked in the door with six half-gallons of Blue Bell. The jig was up. And she knew something was going on. But she wasn’t quite sure what. By the time it was over, we must have had close to a hundred people, mostly from Legacy, through the doors with well wishes and tacky birthday cards. It was a fantastic night with great family and friends. These pictures are of the friends we couldn’t quite run off.

StraightPic   FunnyPic  TooManyTongues

No comment. Thank you, Tonia, for the pics.

And thank you to everyone who came last night. We are so blessed to have made such great friends in such a short amount of time. We love each of you very much. We especially love Jean for washing spoons, Beth for leading us in a rousing rendition of “Happy Birthday” in Portuguese, and Kevin for taking out the trash. And Jill for waiting until they got in the car to ask Kevin why he never does that at home.

Carrie-Anne, I love you. You are the perfect partner. I love you forever.

Allan

An Amen For A "But"

SanJacintoMonument“People embraced, laughed and wept and prayed, all in one breath. As the moon rose over the vast flower-decked prairie, the soft southern wind carried peace to tired hearts and grateful slumber. As battles go, San Jacinto was but a skirmish; but with what mighty consequences! The lives and liberty of a few hundred pioneers at stake and an empire won! Look to it, you Texans of today, with happy homes, mid fields of smiling plenty, that the blood of the Alamo, Goliad, and San Jacinto sealed forever. Texas, one and indivisible!                                   ~Kate Scurry Terrell

April 21, 1836. The actual battle lasted less than 20 minutes. Sam Houston and his ragged band of 910 pioneers routed General Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna, President and Dictator of Mexico and self-styled “Napoleon of the West,” and his proud army.

Happy San Jacinto Day!

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So, I’m preaching Habakkuk 3 yesterday, flying along with the great and wonderful news that we are assured of God’s deliverance in the future because of his mighty acts of deliverance in the past. I’m explaining some of the details of Habakkuk’s hymn, showing how he’s actually recounting all of God’s salvation acts in Israel’s history, from the forming of the community at Sinai to the Promised Land to the period of the judges and on into this impending period of Babylonian captivity. Habakkuk is able to face whatever comes his way with great confidence in his Lord because he has experienced and he remembers how God has saved him in the past.

And I’m trying to connect Habakkuk’s story of God’s acts in the past with our own stories of God’s saving acts in our own pasts. I’m trying to get our congregation to think about their own individual stories of salvation. How were you saved? What were you saved from? How did God save you? Who did he use? What circumstances did he use? What happened when God saved you?

I wanted our brothers and sisters at Legacy to understand we all have our salvation stories. And it would do us a lot of good to tell and re-tell those stories. Because those stories build fath. And they give us assurance of God’s salvation acts in the future.

So I go straight to 1 Corinthians 6:9. “…neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the Kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were.”

And then I paused and read the next line.

“But…”

And then I said, “Can I get an ‘Amen’ for a ‘but’?”

And I immediately wished I hadn’t said it.

The “but” there is the crux of the passage and the central point of the sermon. I had planned to pause there to let it sink in. But I hadn’t planned to ask for an ‘amen’. And I certainly hadn’t planned to ask for an ‘amen’ for a ‘but.” I immediately wished I’d said, “Can I get an ‘amen’ for a ‘conjunction’?” But there it was. It was already out there. And while I got several “amens,” I also got plenty of smirks and snickers. Yes, all the teenagers sit right down front. But it wasn’t just them.

“But you were washed. But you were sanctified. But you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God!”

The ‘but” is huge right there. (Cut it out) It’s everything. I just wish it had come out a little differently.

Then I go directly to Ephesians 2. “As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the cravings of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath.

But…”

I paused again this time. Didn’t ask for the ‘amen’. But I got it.

And at that point I relaxed. It IS appropriate to ‘amen’ that ‘but.’

“But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved!”

Fill in the blank: I was once________.

I used to be __________.

But—praise God!—I’m not ________ anymore!

I’m thankful for my gracious church family at Legacy. They are so kind and so patient with me as I continue learning how to preach. Thank you, brothers and sisters!

And thank you for all those text messages at 3:19 and 3:20 this afternoon!

3:18,

Allan

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